Unconditional Love

I realize what I miss from my parents and why I gravitate towards Chuck's family...unconditional love.  A love that has no boundaries, no strings, no extra commitments.  I want parents to ask my about my life, to care about the bad things that happen to me as well as the good.  I want them to not say they don't ask because they are not prying into my life.  They should care enough to PRY, to be NOSY.

My parents just ask me about the weather, my job and then they tell me about the same...I don't understand, how is that enough of a relationship with your child?  I see Chuck's parents and we talk about everything, all the time, they ask what has been going on and what has been happening.  They are there through the bad as well as the good and they care about each other no matter what has happened in the past, they really, REALLY just want their children to be happy.  They understand that happiness comes with obstacles and trials and bad times, that it doesn't just happen because they wish it to...

Why can I not have that with my parents.  Why can I not expect that from my parents?  Why is that too much to ask?

I have decided I will meet with them but they will have to talk first, I will not be the one to bare my heart first this time, it did me no good the last time.  Now I just have to figure out where to meet them...

Parents

I have not spoken to my parents in almost 2 years.  They were upset with me about finding out about my engagement from someone else, before I could tell them.  They feel that I threw them away for my in-laws.  I do not understand this.  I saw them when my brother flew back to Alaska and I told them I thought we should sit down and talk.  I was told that if any relationship was to renew I was going to have to get through my father.  It didn't matter what my mother said, that he had the final say.  Now I don't know if I even want to try to talk to them.  I haven't slept hardly and I have a migraine since I spoke to them yesterday.  My brother says that there is hurt on both sides and I believe that, but I do not believe they are willing to compromise or even be willing to change just a little to accommodate the way that I am now, instead of just thinking of me as a child still.  I need to think of a neutral place to meet with them so that if there is yelling we don't disturb anyone as well as be a place where we can comfortably talk, where this place could be I am not sure and am open to suggestions.  I really just don't know what to do.

I know that I don't want to become a neurotic mess, like I feel right now.  But I don't want the next time I see them to be at one of there funerals.  I think I will give it one more try and then if they are unwilling I will not talk to them anymore.  It will be a mutual decision.